When all else fails what do you do? In my younger years faced with the problems we've faced in the last several years I would have ranted, raved, cussed, and screamed. None of which would have gotten anything accomplished. Now, after facing years of difficulties and dealing with family illnesses and financial situations I am a much different person. This morning, when I woke up, was the third morning in a row where my furnace had decided not to work and had quit sometime during the night. My dear husband had always gotten it restarted again until this morning, when it refused to restart.
I didn't yell. I didn't rant. I didn't cuss and I didn't scream. I shrugged my shoulders, plugged in some space heaters, and praised God that this had happened now and not during the Polar Vortex. I let it go and I took several deep breaths. If Daddy got it started again today so be it, if not God would see us through. Our home, other than my bedroom, is actually at a comfortable 73 degrees F with the electric heaters (there is no heater in my room at the moment). We prayed, we called our friend the furnace guy, and we let it go. Daddy has gone back and forth all day long attempting to restart it but so far it's never stayed on more than a few minutes. We're not worried. We're warm, we're safe, and we're sheltered in God's hands.
So, if you ask me this week what is working for us in our homeschool, and our home, my only answer is prayer and letting things go. There's nothing better we can do. As a younger woman I'd have "argued" with God about how unfair things are and why must this happen when I do not have the money to fix it. Now I thank God that it is not as cold as it was, that we have electric heaters to keep us warm, and that in truth the furnace did not blow up while we slept.
Sometimes it is the most basic thing of prayer that gets us through each day. I pray daily all year round, but this Lent I've begun praying with intention and being thankful for all that we are given and not asking for those things which we do not have. I have become grateful for what we're given each day instead of wishful for the items on my "I want" list.
I give thanks each day that my husband is still with me, that he is in remission and that for now his COPD seems stabilized. I give thanks each day that Peanut can still see the sun in the sky because her vision hasn't completely given out on her. I give thanks each day that I can walk around without too much pain because one doctor four years ago found a partial solution to my biggest health issue at the time. And I give thanks each day that I live in a place where I am free to homeschool my children and teach them the wonder of God's word.
My life is not perfect. My home and my homeschool are sometimes hectic and make me want to pull out every hair on my head. But it was a life given to me, chosen for me, and any time my step falters I know His hand is there to catch me.
* For those who may be concerned at the time I post this our furnace is running, our house is at 77 degrees F, and we have five electric heaters in case the furnace shuts off again. We're OK :-) ... He has our backs. *
For those of you who are wondering what might be working in our homeschool other than prayer I will refer you to my review of Reading Eggs here. Our free trial of it ends after tomorrow, and we'll miss the program until I subscribe sometime around May (when our finances will allow). But I am grateful for the weeks that we had with it, for the improvement in my children's skills since using it, and for the ability to give it back to them in due time.
Linking up today with Our Busy Homeschool
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Our lives are similar in some respects, especially financial I think, and I can understand every sentiment here. We have frustrating health issues too. Beautiful post! Sometimes we fear our older furnace going out and being unable to pay for it, but then God pulls me back into the fold of his arms, and calms me. Praise God!
ReplyDeleteThat fear seems to come to me often, and honestly a little over a year ago I would have panicked. But since then my husband has been firmly in remission and somehow our furnace seems trivial when I compare it to that. That you for reading this post. I admit I've prayed every night this week to God that he allow our furnace to last the next few weeks, to not blow up in our sleep, to not cause a fire, and any number of other furnace related things. I know that he is listening. I also know that if it were to fail we wouldn't be cold because He gave us friends and family that were generous in donating their space heaters, to go along with ours, to hold us over until the weather warms up. Praise God indeed that he can calm our fears when we give them to Him.
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